There's Nothing Wrong With Confidence

My photo
Brooklyn, New York, United States
whatever. just love me and respect me. I decided to restart my blog based on reality and truth from my perspective and mine only. It may not be just the usual gossip, fashion, party, or whatever type blog, but it'll definitely be the honesty blog. This is the blog that'll make you cry, laugh, WTF all the time, bitch, and whatever other way you choose to react. So, be prepared.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

A Dedication to the Best

even when I'm the only one laughing at myself or my own joke
even when my friend can be as beautiful as I am
even when I look like an ass
Life comes at you fast and as a diva
I'm always prepared to take a picture
especially with the ones I love most and need at all times to live.

Monday, March 2, 2009

The Laws I Live By

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Live.Love.Laugh


Life:

Life is all about taking chances and taking risks.

In the midst of it all, you should be happy but at the same time, no one should be hurt. But always keep in mind, that you do for you and you deserve to be happy.


Love:

Love doesn't mean to just have a significant other and great sex. I mean its a plus but not a must. Love means to be proud of what you have
and to appreciate it. Embrace it.

Laugh:

I laugh at everything, even when I bust my ass in the middle of the street. I'm proud to say I'm Alexandra Brittany Fernandez. And if they laugh, I laugh to because they're jealous.

Other than that I live by no one's rules and no one's standards.
When it comes to sex, I judge no one.
There's no such thing as whore or slut.
It's of experimenting and finding out what a person wants.
I'm Bi. Not confused. Appreciative of both sexes.
I love piercings&tattoos.
I'm 16 years old and that equals to 16 years of wisdom.
And as I get older, this Brooklyn Girl becomes
Better
Smart
Wiser


BOYsssssssss

WTF!?! is up with boys now a days?!? I'm going to speak for myself. I love aggressive, strong, mean guys with that crazy daddy mentality, but I don't want a sex crazed relationship before it even starts. I don't want the Can I Have Pics friendship. I'm not going to smut myself out to make heads happy. Maybe if you were my boyfriend and we have strong bond. Giving naked pics is like getting fuckied in the ass...he has mad shit on you. When things don't go his way he can put your shit out there like no other just like if you were to get fucked in the ass he can say I FUCKED YOU IN THE ASS BITCH. Think about it.

Monday, February 16, 2009

UH! Feeling Sick!

I hate that feeling. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to keel over and die. I mean God forbid. I was just chilling getting ready to go out. Then, I start talking with my dad and got this sudden migraine. I decided to take a nap and every time I went to get up to take a shower, my body oddly rejected the movement. So, I just slept the rest of the time. But, I wake up at 11 something and I'm ready to just vomit. I feel like I'm going to faint. My face is on fire. I just can't fathom what it is. My dad thinks it's because I just got over my period. I know weird but it's not because he grew up with 4 sisters. He takes care of me, so he knows me best. That's why I am daddy's little girl. Any ways back on track from my little tangent. I hope I don't pass out again. Maybe it would teach my mom a lesson about being a real mother and that I am stressed out too, but at the same time that's putting my life in danger. I really don't think she understands that. Uh! Someone help me if you have any advice on what to do.
Zandra some what Loves Life

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

OMG I'm Scared

Today on the A train, I'm standing there trying to figure why the hell I'm late for school. My bag begins to feel heavy, so I put it down. My body shakes and I look down. All I remember is someone catching me and yelling for an ambulance and water. They sit me down and I just throw up. Thank you to the two women who helped me. God will pay you back double fold for what you've done. I sat in the police station in the train station at Hoyt. The ambulance came to get me and dropped me off at LICH which is my hospital. They began running all these tests on me. They were checking my heart and everything.
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It scares me. They are even checking to see if I'm pregnant. I mean if I am, that's weird because I'm not even having sex. I'd be like the Virgin Mary except I'm not a virgin. But it brought such a scare over my life. Life is too short for me to constantly do the same routine over and over and over again. I need to make some changes in my life and be smart about it.
DEFINITELY
Zandra Loves Life

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Oh My Jesus! Its Zion

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This is the love of my fucking life.
No one can top his status.
He's the one I'd fight for.
He's my ride or die.
And despite what Kaveise wrote because he did violate us both on that topic,
he's still amazing.
I believe he's all I'll ever need in the world.
I guess if I think of more I'll write some more.
Love you Zion!

Monday, January 19, 2009

See! Killer Dude

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I travel and shop around the world just as much as I get love from boys and girls.
The ring I rock is from Greece (so is the shirt in the pic).
The jewelry I rock is from Panama.
The Uggs I where are from Australia.
The belly ring I once wore is from Italy.
The earrings I wear are from Peru.
And everything I do and wear is influenced by my travels.

I'm a rockstar.
I party hard.
I spend wrecklessly.


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I may be perfect to my standards but I keep the limelight out my face.
I keep haters close to make me better
and friends closer to teach me better
Yeah
I may come off as a bitch
I may come off as conceited
But everything I say I deserve to feel
I've grown as a person
I loved sneakers.
FUCK THEM.
I love my CHOCOLATE UGGS.
I'm buying 4 more pairs.
I loved my LG Voyager.
FUCK IT.
Pink Blackberry Curve, I got you.
Innocent
SIKE
Emotional
SIKE
Hippie
YEAH MAN!!

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I speak peace
I look for love
I party for fun
I drink for life
I'm me forever.

Live.Love.Laugh


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Thursday, January 15, 2009

The One I Gave My Heart To..no he's not my boyfriend



I dedicate this blog to my Superman. He makes me happy. I never met anyone who makes me feel the way he makes me feel. As much as we fight, it makes me love him and appreciate him even more than I usually would. Even though there are times when I'd push him to he back and try to hide my feelings, he's still the one I run to and cry to. Even though he has a girlfriend who actually deserves him, I still love this boy and I'd do anything for him. I hope she treats him well and I hope he treats her just as well. He's my life ever since the first day I met him and it will stay like that and this statement will never be a subject to change. This young man is great and will be even more great than he is now. Any girl that decides to run over him is going to have to fight me because he doesn't deserve anyone low life bitch. He deserves someone who will love him just as much as I do. Yeah, I sort of fucked up by trying to be this new person with such high standards that I didn't give him anytime what so ever, but I can admit to my shit and if I wanted to...I shall end this at this statement. I love you and you are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me.
Zandra Loves Life
P.S. I think everyone should write a blog to their friend to show some sort of appreciation.




Beyonce - Flaws And All...

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

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There is nothing in this world like a total peace, serenity, and tranquility.
But its a bitch to find.
I mean there has to be that one place or thing at home that keeps you in this state.
In my case its food because no where in my house is there space for me to keep some damn peace with a 3 year old pain in my ass little boy running around. I mean there's nothing wrong with eating, but I have an addiction to it. Its healthy but bad at the same time.Photobucket
But you know what? At least I know that I have a reason to eat. At least no one as to worry that I'm under pressure to be skinny or anything to that nature. I'm not afraid to show people how much I eat. I'm not the girl who goes around reading calories and ingredients. I'm the girl who avoids pork and nothing else. I have a mouth to eat and my mouth is eating. I have a life to live and I'm living life. So cheers to all the proud fat asses out there!
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*high five*
Zandra Loves Life

College Way or the "Highway"

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I've gotten all my colleges together! I'm absolutely proud of myself. Now, all I have to worry about is getting my grades on point and working and what not. I can't afford to lose myself in the mist of weed and ASA across the street from the school, which happens to be one of the best in NYC, I once attended. So here are my choices from best to okay. None of the colleges I have are bad or remedial. Anyways, I'm most likely majoring in Public Relations or double majoring in Public Relations and Marketing.

Georgetown University
University of Southern California
University of San Diego
Hampton University
Rutgers University
Syracuse University
Florida State University
Temple University
Virginia Commonwealth University
Palm Beach Atlantic University

There are two that are completely questionable.

California State University
Fashion Institute of Technology(FIT)

WISH ME LUCK.
Zandra Loves Life

UHUHUHUHUH

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All I need is love. peace, serenity, and tranquility. And all the boys have given me is nothing but issues. Boys are such a problem starting with the fact that they are boys and they are called boys. There's not one place where you can find at least one calm, cool, mature adolescent who you can consider close enough to a man than any other boy his age. Oh gosh, boys are dumb. I'll be back later. I have to serve a fricking in-school suspension due to my 15 lateness between September 2008 and January 2009. Shit, sucks.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

I Am A Daddy's Girl

My dad and I just had a heart-to-heart. I think it could have been one of the amazing things because it just made me realize that I'm completely capable of doing anything and everything if I just stick the plan of doing well in school. Life is hard, but imagine what it would be like if it were simple? I may have the money to do all this stuff and shop but I don't have a gross of money that I can just dish out to pay for college; I'm not rich. But I do have a gross of knowledge that can increase and get me through life. You know what...forget knowledge. I have a lot of common sense and you know what...that's all I really need to get through life. Forget the money, forget the friends, forget the shopping and shoes, forget the idea of easy and hard. As long as I have words, a mouth, a heart, and a mind I am perfectly capable of doing anything I want and persuading people to understand me and where I stand. Life made for journeys. Its for us to figure out where to go and where it shall take us. But remember, you never travel alone. Someone is always going to be with you through everything. In my case, its my father. I love him. I am indeed daddy's little girl and I proudly take that title on because not many girls at my age can really appreciate a true friendship with their father. I guess I'm just one of the lucky ones.
Zandra Loves Life

Friday, January 9, 2009

Believe it or Not

We are so often caught up in our destination that we forget to appreciate the journey, especially the goodness of the people we meet on the way. Appreciation is a wonderful feeling, don't overlook it.-Unknown

No matter how much I want to turn my head away from this, I can honestly say it's true. It's hurtful when you don't show your appreciation for anything, especially your parents. In my case, my mom. Even though she has changed so much that she puts her outside life and friends before her family, I still love her. The thing that gets to me it that she always tells me about how she's paying for this and that and all that jazz. She shouldn't keep trying to make me feel guilty about not showing appreciation for it. I do appreciate it even though its not shown. But whats worst is that I tell her I love her and she would never respond to me. So should I question if she resents me or not? I feel at this point in my life, I'm a better person than my mother, and I feel like I can make it whether she's by my side or if she's not. I appreciate her teaching me indirectly on how not to rely on anyone but myself and not caring what others think of me. I'm a big girl and its my time to shine without her. I'm living my life to the fullest. No one can dare stop me. Even if it comes down to throwing punches and a belt. I'm going to still do what I got to do. I appreciate the journey; I shall continue it.
Zandra Loves Life
Today, a huge bomb was dropped on my head.
I'm being suspensed next week for both Tuesday and Wednesday for being late.
Its hard to make school a main priority because my dean is such an ass to me.
It wasn't my fault that the train decided to delay on my way to school.
But I can only take responsibility for as a young adult.
Not only is it a smart thing to do to avoid showing a sign of disrespect, but also its the right thing to do because I need to show I can take responsibility and learn from it.
I realized that even though I'm getting older and my freedom is better, life is harder.
I don't have my parents like to fall back on; I can keep relying on them to do for me.
Its my time to show that I can do for myself.
Man! Life's crazy.
Zandra

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

My Final Decision as of January 2, 2009

All my life, since I was a little girl, I've always been fascinated with the idea of science. When I reacted junior high school, I then decided to become a cardiologist. I was always fascinated by the heart and I wanted to do so much work it and even possibly becoming an open-heart surgeon. When I got into high school, I pretty much fell apart as a person. All my life, I was so full of strict discipline and very conservative standards. When I started at Brooklyn Friends School, I came into a school full of friendliness and liberal people. I was a little turned of by the people, but then I wanted to follow them. I basically became a follower not a leader. Now that I am in my junior year of high school, I've realized this is my final chance at becoming someone huge at life. I've decided to change my major or hopefully double major in public relations and marketing. I decided to reach to a very old friend of mine who's big in the fashion world to see if I can get any help or connects. Her friend, Rhonesha Byng, decided to contact her and say I can become her intern. I looked up young Rhonesha Byng and I believe that she just might be a great role model. Hopefully, she does take me in as an intern and I can actually have a chance to learn and make my way into the real world just as she has. Just the site of her resume has me inspired to just do me and love me. I have to work in order to get what I truly deserve. By any means necessary, I'm getting there!! Even if that means running to get someone's dry cleaning and coffee.
Signing out for the night,
Zandra Loves Life